My nose is itchy. My nose is itchy and DRY. My nose is driving me crazy. At this point I will try anything to make it stop.

This has included saline drops (which sucks as a remedy) and the most recent thing suggested to me (because in England they aren’t too hip to give you crazy concoctions to stick up your nose and snort) was putting Vaseline up my nose. To lubricate it.

And the sad thing is that I am so desperate – at this point – that my nose is resembling Rudolf the Red Nose Deertrout – that I am actually doing it.

Other things that Vaseline is good for:

  • Chapped lips
  • Cuts
  • Taming your bushy eyebrows
  • Making your teeth all shiney like those pagent girls
  • Removing make-up
  • Boys can use it for…well…whatever they want
  • Greasy up hot guys on the beach and watching their skin sizzle like fried chicken

    Just remember, folks, that you are not supposed to use Vaseline with condoms…the oil breaks them down. So just stick it up your nose if you can…

    image
    it puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again
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    As if the airline industry hasn’t had its fair share of disasters in the past few years, now there is talk of restricting travel to help stop the Asiatic bird flu from spreading.

    Media_httpwwwtravelbu_lamtd

    More here

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    I’ve watched two episodes of this MTV show called My Super Sweet 16 and it makes me so angry that I want to kill people. Seriously. I keep waiting for the punchline to come…but then the credits roll and the show ends. I keep waiting for the super strech limo in the end to explode into a million pieces and end my pain and suffering. But it just doesn’t happen.

    For those of you unfamiliar with the show – it follows around teenagers on their party planning adventure for their sweet 16 party. Fair game. Except they are the most ridiculous, waste of space, self centered group of kids I have ever seen with parents that are just as stupid, wasteful and irresponsible as their children. These are parents that are laying out anywhere from $200k-500k for a party for their spoiled worthless children to buy their friends and propogate the American dream of growing up to suck dick like Paris Hilton and be famous for doing nothing but.

    It really makes me sick. I can’t stand to see people waste their money and raise such idiot children (and then fill my tv space with them).

    I would really like to see at least one episode where the parents decide to buy their kid a brain transplant and a new Mercedes. And then they all commit ritual suicide at the end. And the MTV staff that creates such a shit show end up on a deserted island where they are attacked by “the others”.

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    For those of you who know me and my issues, then you will be a little surprised that I would willingling subject myself to the cold torture of Tallinn in a pre-winter state. But I have. And i’ve managed to survive almost a week sitting in a hotel with an open wireless connection and my skype headset pretending to be in contact with reality, ordering room service, occassionally attemping to wander out into the cold air before be thrown into a cafe where I can sip on some hot cocoa and contemplate my Miami WMC trip this year with the girls.

    image
    town square at night

    I guess I am missing the point on this…Tallinn is actually a very beautiful city. I really wish that I had been able to visit in the summer months where the weather actually gets up to something that I would probably still consider chilly but tolerable. The people that I have met so far have been really nice and willing to give me a few pointers. The food that I have experienced – apart from the office microwaveable mystery salmon – has been really nice and hearty. Mmmmn, I love a good thick soup and a nice steak!

    The old town is really beautiful and history rich – small and quaint. And did I mention that it is clean here? Amazingly clean – no dog poo, no litter. Oh and as far as I have seen – no black people and very few Asians (maybe I am looking in the wrong places?). All of the guidebooks that I read warned of drunken English stag-dos which I also did not have the pleasure of running across (which doesn’t mean that they didn’t actually exist – it was just that I didn’t go out in the weekend evenings).

    And one more plus point. The vodka is cheap as hell. And if you are cold blooded like me – then that is sure to warm the cockles of your heart.

    Other observations to note (for my own memory’s sake):

  • The taxis from the airport are a RIP OFF. It is better to call for a cab service.
  • The taxi cost me 305EEK and really should have been like 50EEK (bastards)
    Read More
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    Madonna – the former Catholic turned Kaballah queen – has deemed it completely safe to fly to Israel and told her PR machine to stuff it. However, she left little Lordes and what’s his name at home not deeming it quite safe enough for her children quite yet.

    Madge recently visited Israel in a five day Rosh Hashana holiday visit. A trek that many Israelis will never forget. The famed singer and actress arrived Wednesday night to celebrate the Jewish New Year and study Kaballah.

    “I realize now that it is no more dangerous to be here than it is to be in New York,” Madonna said.

    Media_httpwwwtravelbu_jnkrd

    Madonna benefited from special security precautions provided by the Israeli government and her own bodyguards who surrounded her and clashed with photographers. The hotel was closed to people who were not its guests, and a police motorcade accompanied her.

    Madonna’s only complaint was about the paparazzi whom she claimed were “naughty.”

    More here http://www.israelnewsagency.com/madonnaisrael609869.html

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    Ahhh, how I love iTunes and iPods and all those happy mediums where I can download things from the comfort of my bedroom. And it just keeps getting better and better. Thank God for bandwidth and wireless connections. I love technology. I love that I can now download all the episodes of Lost and Desperate Housewives from the iTunes store. Yes, I realise that I could probably search around using bit torrent software and get the same thing – at no cost…but I guess I am a bit lazy when it comes to these things and prefer to have the naming convention on my files usable and organised (yes, I hate downloading mp3s with names like frank seanatra).

    If you haven’t yet checked it out – go to the iTunes store and buy some episodes. This is particularly handy if you are living outside of the US and wouldn’t get your little hands on these episodes until later in the year. Granted, it helps when you have your dads US credit card….

    Oh and be sure to watch Lost. I am obsessed. Which reminds me that I need to get in touch with GC about Michelle’s site that I happen to own the domain for.

    Will be in Estonia for a week – probably freezing my little Raynaud’s hands off so hopefully the cast and crew of Lost will keep me company. More photos coming as soon as I get this bluetooth installed.

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    Damn it to hell. I am feeling the strain from connectivity issues and not getting connecting to my phone and the rest of the world. Bluetooth could help this possibly. Wired connection would work but is quite primitive. So here I am not able to share. Who can help me?

    On another note. Met Jackie C today. And I’m not talking about Giles. More to come soon.

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    If you are sick of all the (over)hype of the Cannes Film Festival and want to try out a new film festival – then look no further than the 10th Pusan International Film Festival (PIFF) in the sunny port of South Korea.

    At this festival you can catch selections of Asia’s best films – aprx. 307 films from 73 nations. You can even hope to catch a glimpse at the superstars of Asia. Forget the red carpets of Cannes next year and just head out to South Korea.

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    Jackie Chan and Korean actress Kim Hee-seon greet fans on Friday at the 10th Pusan International Film Festival, which started the day before at the port city.

    Pusan International Film Festival – the official site

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    CRUISE (v.): To walk or drive in an automobile in search of a sex partner; if hustler, for a customer, if homosexual, for a companion. The term is also applied to the heterosexual male who is “out” just for casual sex. – According to the gay dictionary.

    Now my favourite fags can all take a cruise aboard the good ship lollypop with an all male gay focused cruise. Sounds fab sweetie. Time to reinact those Navy Seal fantasies! (Don’t forget to invite me along!)

    Media_httpwwwtravelbu_afhmt

    Two companies that specialise in all male cruises are:
    Atlantis Events (www.atlantisevents.com)
    RSVP Vacations (www.rsvpvacations.com)

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