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OK. That is a slight exaggeration. But it has done its best to piss me off. Piss me off so badly that I actually, for at least 10 minutes, considered throwing my machine out the window, jumping in my car and driving to the Apple store where after purchasing a new Macbook I would then don a black turtleneck and go door to door on my bicycle and try to convert people to the word of Steve. Seriously. Vista is just that bad.

I can’t believe that any company can get away with releasing a giant, steaming hunk of shit like this operating system – let alone having the audacity to charge people for it. Someone needs to nuke Redmond and and the entire engineering team responsible for making my last 2 weeks a living Microsoft hell.

This entire journey is my own fault. Despite what anyone told me about not installing it, I just couldn’t help myself. Yes, I have a rebellious side. And something about thinking that you are a total geek makes you think that you are somehow immune to the issues that every other non-geek might have faced when installing the OS. So I had a copy burning a hole in my nightstand for the last month or more thanks to Bob. I held out for that long. It sat in its sealed packaging taunting me with its promise of smoother graphics and other useless features.

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i clearly have downloaded the entire internet on itunes…

Then it happened. The temptation became too great. Someone from work pinged me with tales of their new Vista upgrade. And, damn it. I hate to be out-teched by a non-geek. After a few glasses of wine, I decided to delve into a fun Friday evening project. I cracked the seal and began the install process. No looking back now…

When I awoke the next day and tried to open up my iTunes for my usual Saturday morning dance around my room, I discovered the greatest of sins.

Yes, a new OS on my machine.

It is like a really bad drunken one night stand that won’t go away. There is no going back. You just have to learn to live with your mistakes. Be polite and try to go on.

But God damn you, Vista. You just keep wrecking my life. My iPod hasn’t been synced in weeks. None of my fucking programs work anymore. I just barely got iTunes semi working again so I can listen to my tunes.

To sum it up. I HATE YOU.

I hate you and your smoother graphics. I hate you and you stupid useless fucking widgets or gadgets or whatever they are called. I hate you because you have taken my 3.2 ghz processor and turned it into a wimpy pile of shit that is equivalent to my 400 mb processor of my teenage years. You can barely recognise my usb mouse. You mistake my DVD player for a floppy disc. Need I go on?

I want you to leave me alone. I want XP back. I want anything but you.

Please Steve Jobs, come and save my sanity.

Thank you and goodnight.

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