In my most recent act of self-obsessed madness I have done something that many would find funny, yet those who know me might not be shocked.

I joined the gym. Yes, that is correct. I joined the Kensington Leisure Centre. The public gym down the street from my house. As Arlie puts it – the ghetto gym.

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exercise

And yes, it is a bit ghetto. But for only £40 a month it seems worth it over the higher priced £90 a month Holmes Place next to us. Because let’s all be serious. At least (at this point) I know that I am probably going to sign up, go for a week and then never return again while it eats away at my direct deposit. And somehow I end up paying £1000 and am neither more physically fit or thinner by the time I decide to cancel.

OK. In all actuality, that was just the first part of the story.

The second part of it has to do with a bar. Or a members only club – of which there are quite a few in London. Most of them are stodgy with strict member joining policies that consist of applying, having recommendations made, essays written, applications sent to a board to review. Basically like applying for university. The bar that I am referring to is called Milk and Honey. A nice little bar in Soho of London that has famed cocktails and a relaxed environment. And yes, a members only policy. Without all the crap. Just a waiting list. When memberships come up, the go to the next in line. Simple.

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milk n honey

What is the point of even bothering to join a members only bar in one of the world’s biggest cities? Well, things do tend to close early here in London. Then you are somehow left in the streets of dirty Soho trying to decide what to do at 1am and inevitably end up at the “Spanish bar” or wandering the streets with people vomiting on your feet. I’m not a big fan to say the least.

And as you have seen from the previous paragraphs, I lack persistance to deal with such crapola…

Now you may be asking yourself what one has to do with the other.

Well…a few months ago I put myself on the waiting list for Milk and Honey.

And now my membership has come up. And I have decided to join.

But at the same time I realised that I joined the gym and am wasting £40 a month not going.

So it seems that the best way to justify such a ridiculous waste of money as joining a bar is by quitting my gym membership and swapping it for the Milk and Honey membership.

It seems wrong in so many ways.

Quitting gym > joining bar.

But somehow I have a feeling that I will get far more use out of the bar membership than I ever did for the gym membership.

And that, my friends, is the way the cookie crumbles in my sad, sad world.

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I wish that Paris Hilton would just stick to the things that she is good at… boning Greek billionaires and getting drunk because she certainly can’t sing, dance or act.

Please make this video / album go away. It has traumatised me this morning. So much so that I have to share it with you just so you can witness how truly horrible it really is.

A) The lyrics are awful
B) She clearly can’t dance. Note how the dancing gets clipped after about 2 seconds of her awkward movements
C) Didn’t I see this video somewhere else before? Um, cross between Cherish (Madonna) and Wicked Game (Chris Isaak)
D) Whoever called this shit reggae needs to go smoke a big fat spliff and listen to some Lee Scratch Perry
E) Her voice is whiny and crap
F) Do I need to continue?
G) The title is Stars are Blind. And clearly tonedeaf and dumb as well…

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I love this guy – O’luminum. Why do people have so much extra time on their hands?

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I love food. Plain and simple. I love any type of food. I love gourmet food. I love street food. I’ll try most anything at least once (ok, I did have a hard time in China with some of the weird street food, but if I were dared, I might have tried it).

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el bulli

So I’ve compiled a little running list of Euro Michelin star restaurants that I’d like to try out (there is one NY restaurant since the Michelin rating system went into NY last year).

The places that I’d like to eat:
Waterside Inn – England
Fat Duck – England
Comme Chez Soi – Brussels
Guy Savoy – Paris
Arzak – San Sebastian
Bernardin – New York

Some of the best places I have eaten:
French Laundry – Napa
El Bulli – Figueres
Bruneau – Brussels
El Roco Can Fabes – Barcelona
Cinc Sentits – Barcelona
Abac – Barcelona
Ot – Barcelona

If anyone wants a date to any of these restaurants, I’ll be happy to show up and be your dining companion…

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I have just seen the geekiest thing ever. Cool as hell, I’d love for someone to rig one of these up in my house. The only thing is that I wonder is how many chicks would actually be impressed by this (apart from myself obviously).

What is it?

An automated party dorm room call MIDAS: Multifunction In-Dorm Automation System. Featuring everything from web control, voice activation, and a security system, to large continuously running information displays, electric blinds, and one-touch parties, the custom designed MIDAS Automation System has brought ease to their lives (if one doesn’t count all the time it took to actually build and program the system).

With the click of a button they have an insta-party complete with LED lights and some electro music that keeps saying “Feel the Energy”.

Read more about MIDAS and my future husband here

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I’m quite excited about my afternoon purchase. It might not excite most of the free world, but damn it if it doesn’t excite me.

So what did I buy? A new gadget? A new cat?

Nope.

I bought some knives.

But not just any old knives.

Global knives.

The best knives.

Yes, perhaps it is a bit geeky to gush over a knife set, but then this is nerdgirl isn’t it? I love cooking. But I HATE cooking when I have to prep with a dull blade. And this is what i’ve been torturing myself with since moving back to London. My Henckels chef knife somehow went missing during the move (I suspect that it is living somewhere in Valldoreix). And while I loved that knife, I’ve been wanting a Global knife for quite a while now.

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So what is so special about Global knives?

Global knives are made from the finest high carbon stainless steel available for producing professional quality kitchen knives. Yoshikin uses its own proprietary stainless steel which it calls CROMOVA 18 Stainless Steel. This steel is hard enough for Global knives to keep their edge for a long time, but soft enough so that it is not too difficult to sharpen the knives. The CRO in CROMOVA 18 stands for chromium and the 18 is the percentage of chromium in the steel. This high percentage of chromium contributes to Global’s good stain resistance. The MO and VA in CROMOVA 18 stand for molybdenum and vanadium. These two elements give a knife good edge retention.

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I remember being 15 years old sitting in my room at night with my headphones plugged into my massive stereo that had 12 inch woofers, playing some Led Zepellin full blast whlile I sat in my bean bag until my ears practically bled listening to Led Zep – slightly stoned – and I completely passing out while the shadows of the street were shining on me…

Damn it – does it just suck getting old or what?

My evenings now consist of brushing my teeth, putting on pajamas and making sure that I have the correct amount of h2o to sleep comfortably…oh and proper flossing and brushing are completely included in that factor.

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Here are a few things that would make my life a) better b) more efficient…

1. Skinny mirror – if someone would just market a skinny mirror then every woman in the western world would purchase one. Is it a lie? Yes. Would I still look at it and love it? Yes! Every woman knows if they have skinny mirrors vs. fat mirrors. You typically go out of your way to avoid the fat mirrors. So why doesn’t someone just market a freaking skinny mirror? Hell, maybe I will do it.

2. Wireless electricity – yep. I said it. We need everything to be wireless. Great that we can couple devices with other devices via bluetooth, wifi, infrared. But those devices and things still need plugs. I want wireless electricity!

3. Free wifi – wifi should be free – everywhere to everyone. Simple.

4. An all in one device that is as simple to use and beautiful as an iPod. Without sucking.

5. More storage / more memory / more processing power

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but god damn it this is the best television programming that I have seen in a long time.

Big Brother UK has Pete the tourettes syndrome guy in it. He walks around yelling WANKERS all the time.

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Nabaztag Wifi Smart Rabbit

So you are probably wondering if a rabbit can really be “smart”? Well this bunny can teach you tai chi, read your e-mail, report the weather or stock market, pull RSS feeds and tell you the time. We’d say that’s pretty smart – but he’s also got personality. Nabaztag can move his ears, play music, talk and whistle, and his body can show off hundreds of colors and special patterns of light. Sometimes he will even have his own random things to say, as long as you can put up with his moods!

Awesome. Buy one now!

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