everyone has been anxiously awaiting an update on the miami wmc 2003 trip, i’m sure. i will give a brief rundown of some of the events of the week.

highlights included:

• breakfast dial-a-cabs and then sitting at news cafe with my puerto rican waiter boyfriend - view here
• breakfast bottle of chardonnay - view here
• dinner at joe’s crab shack
• maw electronica party funk standing in the air-conditioned doorway
• wocka wocka panties - bellisima!
• stealing the drugged out girl’s t-shirt - view here
• day trip to saw grass mills in search of a gameboy advance sp
• urban outfitters
• my curious george man in the yellow hat look
• adidas wristbands - view here
• dirty girl photoshoot - view here
• finding little naked reto in my bed one morning
• “no guest list tonight” video shoot with ornella - view here
• maw/maxim beach party ala free heinekins - view here
• fantastically color-coordinated outfits
• explaining to ornella that mmmn-hmmm means yes and mmmnnn-nnnn means no while in the midst of a deep slumber
• 50 cent - in da club blasting from our rented toyota corolla - go shawty, it’s your birthday!
• standing on the corner of 8th and ocean for 30 minutes before realising that it was really the corner of 7th and ocean - view here
• goldie’s daughter and her gucci bag - view here
• getting stopped at customs with a burberry bag full of porn
• adam recruiting naked girl to be door bouncer - view here
• my cuban housewife - view here

lowlights included:

• carlos cordon calling from guatamala to tell us that we had to stop the party we were having - view here
• the theft of my kangal - view here
• wasting about 12 tons of fresh sashimi after overordering - view here
• dried out krispy kreme donuts
• puerta sagua burps - view here
• eating an entire half-dozen bad oysters before realising they were bad - view here
• not going to the beach for the 4th year in a row
• flying economy class and getting stuck in the middle seat with a fat man next to me